I want to return to Pooh Corner

I spent another New Year’s Eve alone.  No party favors, crummy finger food or family gatherings.  Instead I spent the evening bingeing YouTube.  

While flipping between channels I came across a 2022 episode of Firing Line with Margaret Hoover.  Her guest was Kenny Loggins, my all time favorite singer and songwriter.  Even though the episode was almost three years old, I grew sadder as I watched the interview because Kenny announced that he planned to stop touring in 2023.  He said that 50 years on the road was enough.  His retirement was news to me. 

Crashing Caesars Tahoe

My first concert was in 1981 at Caesars Hotel & Casino in Lake Tahoe, Nevada.  My friend and I were 18-years old at the time, and decided to try and buy tickets because Kenny was performing.  We got dressed up in our best OP shorts and polo shirts, went to the Caesar’s ticket office and bought two tickets for that night’s concert.

That evening, when it was our turn to be seated by the usher, we scored two outstanding seats in the last row of the theatre.  Our success in nailing the much sought after seats became my first lesson in adulthood. I realized that ushers gave the preferred seats to the highest tippers so our generous $5 gratuity got us the nosebleed section.  

The theatre had a two drink minimum.  My friend boldly ordered two beers; I ordered two Diet Cokes.  We were living large that night – drinks and a concert inside of a casino at the ripe old age of 18.  Life was good.

Kenny played for about an hour, which seemed short but it was enough to whet my appetite for 37 more Kenny concerts.

Listening to Kenny’s Memories

As the interview continued I realized that for the past four decades there’s always been a new album that captured the essence of current pop culture.  Kenny has had five top singles on the Billboard 100, released fourteen solo albums, won two Grammy Awards as well has scored theme songs for several iconic movies such as Footloose, Top Gun and Caddyshack.  

Over the years he collaborated with, and introduced me to, other artists including Amy Grant (Return to Pooh Corner), Stevie Nix (Whenever I Call You Friend) and Michael McDonald (This Is It, What A Fool Believes and Heart to Heart) who became favorites as well.

For me, Kenny’s greatest achievement is that he wrote the soundtrack of my life.  His songs chronicled my entry into adulthood, marriage, parenthood and eventually a divorce.

Children’s songs such as Return to Pooh Corner, The Real Thing and Celebrate Me Home became especially meaningful when I became a father.  

I went through a divorce when the children were young and left them without a full time dad.  For years I’ve questioned whether or not I should have stayed for the kids.  I still feel pain for saving myself instead of putting them first.  

A few years ago I saw Kenny at the Mountain Winery, a music venue in Silicon Valley, and that’s when I first heard The Real Thing.  

The song tells the story between a father and his daughter as he puts her to bed. “You’re going to bed alone again tonight…and you wonder why.”  Kenny explains that he divorced mom because “love should teach you joy and not the imitation that your (mom and I) tried to show you.”

I got to put my kids to bed 56 days a year, eleven percent of the year.  My kids asked me why they didn’t get to spend more time with me and I never had a good answer.  What I do know is eleven percent wasn’t fair, nor was it enough.

Did I make the right decision?  For me I made the right choice.  For my children, as the song goes, “You’re so afraid your life is over…how can anybody be so selfish and treat you all so cruel, go on and scream at me and cry…but your daddy doesn’t live here anymore.”

Nearly two decades later I’m still unsure if I made the right call.  Maybe this is why I want to return to Pooh Corner.  I would give anything for the opportunity to tuck my kids in, to kiss them and as I walk out of their room have my Pooh bear that’s wrapped in their arms whisper to me, “Boy welcome home.”

Kenny has written, collaborated and sung hundreds of songs.  He has scored my life for more than forty years.  Of all his songs, The Real Thing is embedded in my heart.

Growing old together

When I saw Kenny in Lake Tahoe forty-four years ago he was an energetic 33-year old rock n’ roller.  Today he’s 76.  It’s sad that I will not go to a Kenny concert again.  I’ll keep my playlists close and when I need a friend, or want to visit Pooh Corner, or I need to be reminded of What A Fool Believes, he’ll still be with me. However, it won’t be the same.

Maybe Kenny’s most poignant lyric comes from Caddyshack, “I’m alright.  Nobody worry ‘bout me.”  We’ll be alright without seeing Kenny in concert or downloading a new album every year, but we’d be a better off with a few hundred more songs.

_______________

In the comments below, let me know your favorite musical artist(s) and why.